Friday, January 29, 2010


Is workaholism and busyness and overcommitment even worth it?  I mean, I enjoy the spending money, and continue to believe that "later" this will all be worth it and "next year" will be so much better, but what about now?  Will there really ever be a next year or later, or is it, and I fear it may be, that tomorrow is not real, and today is all there is?  [Praise Jesus for the eternal tomorrow we have to hope (patiently) for.]  So what am I doing with my now?  I truly despise going to class three nights a week on top of the day, working all hours in between, and the homework and time that come on top of those things.  I am so tired on the weekend it is all I can do to do more than lay on the couch and watch tv and movies.  I am being pulled in so many different directions I cannot commit my whole heart, time, and attention to any one of them, so all of them suffer.  All of them. 

I need a break.

"Let the morning bring word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you.  Show me the way I should go, for to you I life up my soul.  Rescue me from my enemies, O Lord, for I hide myself in you.  Teach me to do your will, for you are my God; may your good Spirit lead me on level ground." -Ps 143:8-10

Saturday, January 16, 2010

Day 6?

I was just thinking about how Sarah is out of town and thus my motivation to train is negative.  She is super encouraging and motivating and my favorite person to train with, and its hard to go without her!  SOooo, I decided to blog in order to document my discouragement, and find the motivation needed to get out of my apartment and to the rec.  Bahh. 

Our first week of training is close to over and I have not skipped a work out yet.  [This could potentially change tomorrow as I am leaving right after church for Western Kansas for the night, but Monday is a "free" day, so I could always make it up there.  But I am going to try to go before church tomorrow morning...fingers crossed.] 

Oh btw, I quite possibly chose the very worst semester ever to train for something, much less work, plan a wedding, have any friends, or do anything outside of school and homework.  I am taking a graduate level English class on top of sixteen other hours of classes and, after only syllabus day, feeling the weight of it all.  Dear Lord, keep me sane and let me end the semester with friends and my family and fiance still loving me.  Thanks, Amen. 

I am speaking at a high school purity conference tomorrow night, just for the girls, on finding your worth and identity in Christ.  If you think about me today or tomorrow say a prayer for me and especially for those girls that God would work on their hearts and teach them. 

"For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." Eph 2:10

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Day 2 Training

Yesterday began Sarah's and my triathlon training.  The race is in July so we are starting now in order to complete the beginner training workout we will be super ready by then.  I am TIRED!  Sheesh.  But motivated and excited to prove my lovely fiance, sister, and mom wrong that I cannot commit to something and actually do it.  I'm planning to blog some about it as another form of accountability.

My last semester of classes starts tomorrow...what in the world!  Except I have one more class to take in the summer... but I'm not really counting it...

Wedding planning is coming along.  Four months and a day until we are married!!!!!!!!!  I wish it was tomorrow.  We started pre-marital counseling today, so in six weeks we should be super ready and the perfect couple.  Phew ;)

Mehhh, I'm tired.